I know I haven’t written in a while. I’ve spent a lot of time consumed with bodily aches and pains and that really took my focus off anything beyond surviving. Thankfully I’ve left the first trimester of this pregnancy behind and I’m feeling 90% human these days.
With 166 days to go until my due date (not like I’m counting or anything) I find myself increasingly anxious at the slow pace of meeting my personal goals as well as the backslide that pregnancy inevitably causes in matters like my weight. It also takes its toll on my relationships as it renders me not unlike a wounded harbor seal flopped over onto the couch for months at a time.
I felt a lot of mom and wife guilt for a while there as my daughter spent many hours with her grandmother instead of me, my husband had meals of takeout and frozen crap instead of healthy fresh foods and the cats were getting stuck in various piles of junk around the house, trekking everything from random stickers and grocery bags to dust bunnies the size of my ever growing fetus from their tails.
Pregnancy is a heck of a thing.
Of course pregnancy also brings that desire to NEST. And it’s hard to effectively nest when you’re eagerly awaiting a call from your real estate agent with an offer for your home so you can move onto the next phase of life in that area, moving from an 1100 square foot condo to a 700 square foot basement apartment… yes, we be nuts.
But it’s the plan, to rough it a bit (please- we will still have more than most people on this world and we better never forget it) and it will fast track us to being able to afford our ultimate goal of an ideal home in the relatively near future.
Life feels a bit stagnant right now, I’m not good at waiting, never have been. Patience is something I need to develop because from life experience I’ve learned that things happen when they are supposed to and yet I’m always chomping at the bit for progress on my terms.
Hopefully now that I’m in a better state of health I will get back to more regular posting but once life takes off with our plans I’ll have a whole lot more to share. If you’re tuned in at this point I feel like you’re reading the prologue a bit because I feel like this is the prologue to life as a whole.